The Neighbors

We've now spent many evenings sitting out in the back yard chatting with the neighbors, Roslindale natives Paul and Dierdre. They are super nice, fun people and we hit it off right away. So, as an enjoyer of food and the preparation thereof, I started asking about the things they like to eat so that I might one day wow them with an elegant yet casual dinner spread. Since our grills our 30 feet apart, I often see them cooking dinner. The only things I've seen them grill, however, are steaks, burgers, hot dogs, and boneless skinless chicken breasts, leaving me little to go on. During my initial inquiries, we established that Dierdre does not eat anything that has ever spent any portion of its life in water.

Lobsters? "God No."
Fried fish? "No sir."
Shrimp? "Eww."
Salmon? "I'll eat fish sticks but I don't really like 'em."

OK, so seafood's not their thing. Would you ever try venison? "Not in a million years." Her eating habits have since turned into a kind of running joke, where I talk about the stranger things I eat/have eaten and ask her if she likes them. The answer, invariably, is no. I had the queen mother of these exchanges with her yesterday evening. It started when Paul was saying how Dierdre sends him to work with treats for the mechanics in the auto shop he manages.

"Today I sent watermelon, I also do a lot of bacon."
"Wait, you send him to work with a pile of fried bacon?"
"No, bacon, the Boston way of saying baking."
"Oh, that makes more sense, but you could make a great salad out of watermelon, bacon, and some cheese."
"What kind of cheese?"
"Oh, goat or feta are the most common."
"I hate both of those."
"What kind of cheese do you like?"
"American."
"That's it?"
"Sometimes cheddar."
"Those are about the only two cheeses that would not be good in a bacon/watermelon salad. What about mozzarella?"
"I like mozzarella, but only melted on pizza, I wouldn't eat a big hunk of fresh mozzarella."
"Do you like blue cheese?"
"Hate it."
"Then what do you dip your chicken wings in ?!"
"I don't eat chicken wings."